<html><head><meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body style="word-wrap: break-word; -webkit-nbsp-mode: space; line-break: after-white-space;" class=""><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><span style="font-style: normal;" class=""><b class="">Trigger Alert! </b></span></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px;" class=""><font face="Times New Roman, serif" size="3" class="">Some of the CRAIC folk may be amused by the following column, and my apologies to those who are not followers of “Christianity”.</font></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px;" class=""><font face="Times New Roman, serif" size="3" class="">Stay hopeful;</font></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px;" class=""><font face="Times New Roman, serif" size="3" class="">Allan</font></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class=""><br class=""></i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class=""><br class=""></i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class="">This e-mail is sent only to a voluntary subscriber list. If you no longer wish to receive these weekly columns, send a blank e-mail (no message) to <a class="moz-txt-link-abbreviated" href="mailto:softedges-unsubscribe@lists.quixotic.ca" style="color: rgb(149, 79, 114);">softedges-unsubscribe@lists.quixotic.ca</a>. Or write to me personally, <a href="mailto:jimt@quixotic.ca" class="moz-txt-link-freetext" style="color: rgb(149, 79, 114);">jimt@quixotic.ca</a> or <a href="mailto:rewrite@shaw.ca" class="moz-txt-link-freetext" style="color: rgb(149, 79, 114);">rewrite@shaw.ca</a></i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class=""> If your reply to anything in this column is blocked, use either address to write to me directly.</i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class=""> </i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class=""> </i></div><h1 style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 24.533334732055664px; font-size: 16pt; font-family: "Arial Black", sans-serif;" class=""><span lang="EN-US" class="">Now for something completely different </span></h1><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class="">By Jim Taylor</i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class=""> </i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class="">Thursday January 13, 2022</i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""><i class=""> </i></div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class="">The only channel where I can watch <i class="">Jeopardy</i> is a U.S. channel out of Seattle. So, in addition to the contestants’ wit and wisdom, I get to listen to ads for U.S. pharmaceutical products.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> The first few lines urge you to try the drug. Followed by a full minute – or, in magazines, a full page, or more -- of warnings about possible risks and side effects.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> It got me thinking that maybe other human institutions should be equally up-front about potential consequences.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Maybe political parties should caution campaign workers: “Getting involved may cause you lose your sense of impartiality. Politics has been known to disrupt family relationships…”</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Military recruiting posters might include a line: “Potential risks may include death or dismemberment.”</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Or how about fanatic allegiance to a sports team -- the Saskatchewan Roughriders, say: “May affect colour vision, rendering all colours but green invisible. May have financial implications for travel to distant games; before becoming a Roughrider believer, talk to your credit counsellor…”</div><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"> </p><h2 style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 19.933334350585938px; font-size: 13pt; font-family: "Arial Black", sans-serif;" class="">Caveats about Christianity</h2><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> But surely the most obvious target would be religion. So I’ll chose the one I know best-- Christianity.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Imagine the caveats!</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Christianity has over 2000 years of testing and development. It can renew and refresh your life. It can bring comfort in times of pain, relief in times of grief, and can help you clarify your attitude to life. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> But you should be aware…</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Christianity can also have significant side effects, including but not limited to, blindness to other faiths, intolerance of other viewpoints, and addiction to biblical proof-texting. Do not commit to Christianity without testing your level of credulity. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Christianity is not a cure for depression or suicidal impulses. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Do not take Christianity if you have allergies to Popes, Bishops, Deacons, Pastors, Ministers, and/or group therapists. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Do not turn to Christianity if meaningless platitudes, quotes taken out of context, or memorized liturgical responses induce nausea.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> You will be asked to believe that a few drops of water can quench the eternal fires of hell, and that a tasteless wafer is actually bread.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Mainstream Christianity is not recommended if you have religious pre-conditions, such as participation in Hare Krishna, charismatic Pentecostalism, or any Presbyterian court. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> When practicing Christianity, avoid books by Thomas Merton or Eckhardt Tolle. Richard Rohr’s writings may cause dyspepsia. Anything written by Teilhard de Chardin, Karl Rahner, or John Shelby Spong may cause migraine headaches. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Beware of generic imitations of Christianity. Insist on the original and only true formulation. Do not be misled by Scientology, Eckankar, or Theosophy. Also avoid contemporary paraphrases of the Bible, which may result in cognitive dysfunction.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Take Christianity exactly as prescribed -- weekly. Overdoses cannot be counteracted by either Naloxone or EpiPens . Taking Christianity less frequently may result in reduced immunity when Jehovah’s Witnesses ring your doorbell. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> If you notice your friends’ eyes glazing over whenever you speak, do not call 911. Get yourself to the nearest addiction-group meeting immediately. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Keep Christianity and its doctrinal texts out of the reach of children, as their frontal lobes are not yet sufficiently developed to handle the complexities of Christian teachings. </div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 18.399999618530273px; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;" class=""> Consult your spiritual advisor about the merits of taking Christianity regularly. Then enjoy your new life!</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 13.800000190734863px; font-size: 9pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;" class="">*******************************************************</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 13.800000190734863px; font-size: 9pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;" class="">Copyright © 2022 by Jim Taylor. Non-profit use in congregations and study groups encouraged; links from other blogs welcomed; all other rights reserved.</div><div style="margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt; line-height: 13.800000190734863px; font-size: 9pt; font-family: Arial, sans-serif;" class=""> To send comments, to subscribe, or to unsubscribe, write <a class="moz-txt-link-abbreviated" href="mailto:jimt@quixotic.ca" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; color: rgb(149, 79, 114);">jimt@quixotic.ca</a></div></body></html>