[Sundaycommunity] LETTER TO THE SUNDAY COMMUNITY ABOUT MUSIC

Wed Jan 4 19:58:25 PST 2023

Hi Brian, and our thoughts and prayers are with you and Mary Lou.   We want
to say thk you very much for wrapping your warm musical arms around us all
these years.  And lifting our spirits with your inspiring music.  (Julia
was one of those sometime vocalists to help you in your efforts.)  But now
you need to turn your attention to the evolving situation with Mary Lou.
Where Mary Lou is, she/they need you and your music.  Pls be confident in
knowing we support you with all our heart and prayers.

Thk you, Brian.

Bill and Julia.

c 416-708-6677

On Wed, Jan 4, 2023 at 10:33 PM Dave Snelgrove via Sundaycommunity <
sundaycommunity at lists.integralshift.ca> wrote:

> Brian, your message to the Community touches me deeply.  I am so sorry
> that this difficult transition, on many levels, has come upon you and Mary
> Lou.  It seems the pace of our aging is beyond our control, although we can
> have a little impact on this or that piece.  But the heart, the courage,
> the forbearance required seem to me to be the toughest part of life so far.
>
> Of course I resonate with your decision to step away from leading the
> music. The time I was encouraged and then able to join you, Mario, and
> Michael,  was quite wonderful to me.  I loved every minute.  Just
> contributing a little bit was a gift.  I believe others may come forward.
> But there's no doubt that your time provided a solid basis for the vibrant
> musical Worship that characterized the Sunday Community.  Bravo, Brian.
> And MaryLou.  May the music live on.  And on.
>
> Much love.  Rosemary
>
>
> On Wed., Jan. 4, 2023, 8:27 p.m. Brian Halferty via Sundaycommunity, <
> sundaycommunity at lists.integralshift.ca> wrote:
>
>> Dear Members of the Sunday Community,
>>
>> t has been quite a few years since Mary Lou and I, with our family,
>> joined the Sunday Community, down in the basement of the Catholic
>> Information Centre, beside St. Peter’s Church, on Bathurst Street in
>> Toronto.  We thought of ourselves at the time as being, in a way, “on
>> pilgrimage” – looking for a worshipping community that was a real
>> community.  We had been searching for a long time. We found it when we
>> arrived at the CIC.  Monique Newton, one of the earliest and most central
>> members of the community, spoke to us immediately, and welcomed us, and
>> made us feel at home.  In those days, there were still families, with their
>> children, who were part of the community.  We were so impressed when a
>> phone call came to our house during the week after we first joined the
>> community, a phone call not for Mary Lou or I, but for our kids – someone
>> inviting them to come and join the other young people for a movie later in
>> the week.
>>
>> We participated in the Sunday Eucharist with the community for a couple
>> of years, I think, before I joined the other musicians in the music
>> ministry. What a group! We had 4 guitarists, led by Heather, Mike on
>> keyboard, occasionally Mike’s brother David on trumpet, a flute player, 2
>> or 3 additional vocalists, and for awhile a tambourine player as well.
>> Over the years, people moved out of town to other places, or their lives
>> took different turns, and the “band” dwindled in size, until it got down to
>> just myself on guitar and Mike on the keyboard.  Even then, for special
>> occasions like Christmas or Easter, we were able to pull together some of
>> the old gang to do music together. What fun!
>>
>> COVID-19, of course, put us in this very strange situation of having to
>> stay apart while trying to continue to gather together.  Our gathering
>> together has been on Zoom – we’ve been doing it now for more than 2 ½ years
>> --- and we have not been able to enjoy the reality of singing together in
>> the same place.  Still, there has been a strong, spiritual linkage that has
>> continued, something of value to us all.
>>
>> Mary Lou and I both worked as lay Chaplains in Catholic high schools in
>> Toronto, a position of spiritual leadership in which we each tried to do
>> our best to answer to the spiritual needs of students and their families,
>> and of the staff as well. I have described this to people as “the best job
>> I ever had,” a job that was demanding, and difficult in many ways, and
>> sometimes a source of anguish, but at the same time, a role in which I felt
>> called, and blessed, and in which I often experienced success and
>> satisfaction.  Underlying this work of Chaplaincy, for both Mary Lou and I,
>> was the need to be connected to a source of spiritual inspiration and
>> support for ourselves personally.  And we found that source, that spring of
>> fresh water, in the Sunday Community, where we felt real community with
>> others, with God, with the Church.
>>
>> In recent weeks, as you know, Mary Lou has not been well, has not been in
>> a good place physically and mentally.  She has been hospitalized since
>> November 24th, and since Dec. 14th has been at Providence Health Care in
>> an “Interim placement” situation, receiving care while waiting for a
>> Long-Term Care placement to be approved.  Those of you who have been part
>> of the Sunday Zoom liturgy will know that Mary Lou has, with help, been
>> able to join the Zoom call from hospital on recent occasions, including
>> Christmas Eve, when I spent the day and evening with her.
>>
>> In order to be with Mary Lou on Christmas Eve, I had to step away from
>> leading the music that night. And now I have to tell you that, after a lot
>> of thought, and after talking this over at length with my family, I will
>> have to step away completely from organizing and leading the music, at
>> least for the next while.
>>
>> Being in a hospital, away from home and familiar surroundings, is very
>> difficult for Mary Lou.  The family and I are committed to trying to be
>> with her as much as possible through all of this.  That includes me, and
>> especially me, because it is me that Mary Lou most wants to have with her.
>> Mary Lou will not be coming home again to live. She requires too much care
>> and needs to be in a place where that can be provided.  I can’t explain to
>> you what a deep heartache this is. It is a painful tragedy all the way
>> around. I am so grateful for the generous and loving support our family –
>> children, spouses, their children – have given to Mary Lou through this
>> awful transition, and have given to me also as I learn to live with what is
>> happening.
>>
>> I am also concerned about the Sunday Community. I know that the music is
>> an important part of our worship, and indeed, an important part of my own
>> spiritual and prayer life. I feel badly about having to stop providing it.
>> May we find the way(s) to continue worshipping together and being sources
>> of inspiration for each other.
>>
>> Love to all of you,
>>
>> Brian
>>
>> PS: Since I started putting this letter together, Sylvia Skrepichuk has
>> been in touch with me. She has offered to lead the music for the next
>> couple of months, at least, and I have agreed to assist her by continuing
>> to send out the weekly Song Programs.
>>
>> Thank you, Sylvia.
>>
>> B.
>>
>>
>> *Brian J. Halferty*
>> 146 Sumach Street, Apt. 214
>> Toronto, ON  M5A 0P7
>> 416-431-0038
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