[Sundaycommunity] Dignifying the Other, a reflection for the fourth Sunday of Advent

[Arthur Blomme]

    DignifyingThe Other

Arthur Blomme

Several months ago, the World Community of Christian Meditation (WCCM) 
introduced some of us to the Dignity Index—a valuable tool for deepening 
the practice of Christian charity. This framework uses an 8-point scale 
to measure how we respond when we disagree. Each point represents a 
particular mindset toward the other side, ranging from one: seeing our 
adversary with total contempt, to eight:recognizing the inherent dignity 
in every person no matter what.

A comprehensive set of resources for building and teaching skills for 
dignified disagreement is available at:
https://www.dignity.us/resources.

The site offers practical exercises and guidance to enhance charitable 
disagreement in various contexts—teaching, community, politics, family, 
and the workplace. How much easier might our lives have been had we 
encountered such training earlier in our lives? Evaluating our own 
responses to conflict—by asking how dignifying or contemptuous they 
are—can surely aid us on the path toward a global community united in love.

I also find this scale of dignified disagreement to be a helpful lens 
through which to read the Gospel narrative. This year’s reading for the 
Fourth Sunday of Advent offers a compelling example.

In the Gospel passage, Joseph’s first reaction to Mary’s pregnancy was 
to minimize the scandal: “/*Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling 
to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly*//./” 
This action preserved a measure of dignity for Mary, yet still 
acquiesced to the contempt demanded by the social conventions of his time.

After much contemplation, an angel appeared to Joseph, calling him 
toward a higher order of dignified action: “/*When Joseph awoke from 
sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his 
wife…”*/ Joseph thus chose to fully dignify Mary by accepting her as his 
wife, defying the social pressure to do otherwise.

What strikes me in this passage is the power of the social narrative to 
dictate contempt for Mary because of her perceived violation of norms. 
That power is even greater today. We are continually bombarded with 
narratives that tell us not only what to consume, but also whom to hold 
in contempt. Certain stories are amplified, while others are ignored. 
Powerful interests increasingly own and control the narratives that 
shape our social reality. In a time of growing inequality, war, and 
injustice, we must be critically aware of how our beliefs are being 
manipulated. As the saying goes, the first casualty of war is truth.

The scale of dignified disagreement can help us discern truth in our 
political discourse. Dignified disagreement is far more likely to reveal 
truth than contemptuous disagreement.

I have come to admire Jeffrey Sachs for the dignity he extends even to 
those with whom he disagrees. I first became aware of him at the 
beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic and initially viewed him with some 
contempt for his support of the vaccine roll-out. Although it helped 
that he later reconsidered his position, what truly impressed me was the 
dignity he showed toward Donald Trump. Sachs praised Trump for 
attempting diplomatic engagement with Putin on Ukraine—noting he was the 
first in years to meet directly with the Russian adversary. He conveyed 
disappointment in Trump’s failure to follow through, critiquing his 
ideas and actions without ever showing contempt for his person.

The Dignity Index is a useful tool, not only for evaluating personal 
relationships but also for assessing the truthfulness and integrity our 
leaders demonstrate in engagement with others—whether across a table or 
across nations.





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